Let Her Go
by BatmanSwiss
Summary: Five times he had let her go. Not even Time can heal a heart so completely shattered.


A/N: This ficlet is inspired heavily by the Passenger song "Let Her Go". There is an excellent fanvideo on youtube ( /rZtV3UqeLck) that cemented this song as my "official" AlicexHatter theme.

Spoilers: standard alert, mentions happenings from both films.

Disclaimer: Still don't own them :(

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Let Her Go

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The night crept quietly upon Underland, riding in on a gentle summer breeze that banished the heat of the day. Tarrant Hightopp stood alone on a balcony of Marmoreal castle, watching the brilliant colors of sunset mute and finally darken into evening shades of blue and purple. His eyes, ever the window to his troubled soul, shifted color in much the same way as the sky before him.

The hatter's thoughts were heavy, and not at all set on appreciating the surrounding beauty. No, his mind was trapped in an endless circle of images, words, sights and sounds, all centered on a single person.

Trapped in his own mind as he was, the irony of his current location did not escape him. The balcony he stood upon, the very rail he leaned so heavily on now, were the same that _she_ and he had once occupied. But that was so very long ago, it seemed. So much had passed, and twice since that night she had disappeared. Twice she had vanished back to her own world, to a life far from him and the land that both loved her dearly.

Tarrant shook his head in an effort to dispel the thoughts, but they continued to tumble about.

He recalled the first time he met her, though of course he hadn't realized that it was _her_ at the time, seeing as how they had not been introduced…. In his young eyes, she had seemed almost ethereal, her pale skin glowing against the backdrop of snow, her cheeks flush in the cold air. Only the heartbreak of his father's seeming disappointment had been enough to break the spell her presence had wrought.

The second time her met her, he still did not recognize her fully, though she had seemed familiar in some way. She had been bursting with muchness, and he had known instantly that she was something wondrous. But again, life had thrown in a traumatic interruption, and as a result his own stubbornness drove her away.

The third time, she was no longer grown, but reduced to a child. It had left him reeling a bit, seeing as how he remembered her as much larger. There was no mistaking that muchness, though. It was definitely her. Time sped the hands of the clock, and that visit to Underland whizzed by quickly. The hatter had wanted her to stay, as they had such a fun time at the tea party, but he knew that she must return to Above if she were to grow to the proper age and size.

The fourth time- his heart skipped and sped all at once. The fourth time, when he had seen her emerge from Tugley Wood in her miniature state, he knew that this was the girl from his past. Sure, she had been lacking that glorious muchness, but he would know her anywhere.

And when she had stepped forth to fight the Jabberwocky, Tarrant had realized something incredible.

He was in love with her.

When she moved to drink the Jabberwocky blood, he couldn't help himself. He knew that she couldn't stay, but his heart seemed to have developed a mind of its own.

He silently watched her vanish, his eyes dark and his heart broken.

The last time. He would never forget hearing the joy in her voice when she saw him, the pain when he was slipping away. The desperation when they stood before the mirror, and she realized that this would be her final moments with him.

That was when he realized that she loved him back.

But their Time was up, and they both knew she couldn't stay. She had a family of her own to return to, and this journey had taught them both to appreciate that above all else.

And he let her go.

Tarrant stared at his right hand, imaging the feel of her soft fingers as they slipped across his rough skin one final time. He could smell the salt of her tears, the sound of her goodbye echoing mournfully in his ears.

All of the dizzying thoughts and voices that normally occupied his mind fell silent at the memory.

And Time slowed, then stopped, realizing that he could not heal the shattered heart of the hatter with his movement.

A soft sound broke the spell, and the world lurched back into motion. Tarrant turned suddenly, identifying the noise as a shoe scraping across stone.

His eyes first took in the offending footwear, then slowly traveled up the intruder. Long legs hid beneath a light summer dress, no stockings in sight. The hatter's eyes widened further as he skipped hurriedly over the corset-less torso, straight up to the heart-shaped face framed by short blonde curls. Green eyes dark with uncertainty peered back at him.

"Hatter?"

That simple word, comprised of two teeny syllables, banished all the pain and sadness that had encased his heart and sent it soaring.

Tarrant ran across the balcony and pulled her into a fierce hug. He pulled away after a few moments in fear of crushing her, but kept her close.

Her head was lowered, the high edges of her curls falling to frame her face. "Hatter, I'm sorry. I tried to find the palace of dreams, but I couldn't find my way. And so I came here, to tell you in person that I-"

"You finally cut your hair."

She stopped in mid-sentence, her eyes snapping up in surprise. It was as though Alice had grown so used to the change that she had forgotten he had never seen it. "Do you like it?" she asked simply.

Tarrant smiled down at her, eyes glowing green in contentment as he gently tucked the short strands behind her ear. "It suits you," he whispered. "It is very… muchy. So very Alice."

Alice grinned, her eyes shining in relief. She gazed up at him, and for a moment neither dared to move. Then Alice remember something that she had started to say, something that must have been important. He watched as she gathered her muchness.

"Hatter, Tarrant…."

And then it clicked. The way she chewed thoughtfully at her bottom lip, the way her eyes lowered to his chest as her soft hands absently adjusted his bow. The reason that she had found a way back into Underland (no simple feat without a guide). She wanted to tell him that One Important Thing.

His heart skipped, and he was sure that his eyes changed to some new and wonderful color as he pulled her in close. Alice released his bow, her hands flat on his chest and the only thing separating the two.

He placed a finger beneath her chin and gently tilted her face upward. Her eyes were wide in surprise, lips parted slightly as she struggled to remember to breath. The summer heat seemed to radiate from within them, but neither noticed as he leaned in to close the last space in between them.

And then his lips found hers, and the world exploded around them.

Her mouth was soft against his own as he pressed gently. Instantly she melted against him, her hands coming to rest in the tangled mess of his hair. The kiss deepened, and the breath that Alice had been so desperate to find escaped as a small moan when his tongue teased along the edge of flesh, begging for entry.

They became lost in each other, and in that moment, finally became complete.

 _Five times…._

They slowly separated, the need for oxygen pulling the pair back to the world around them.

Five times, Tarrant had let her go.

As the stars of Underland winked slyly overhead, and the Cheshire moon smiled down upon them, Tarrant swore that he would never let her go again.


End file.
